The November 2008 Nursing Board Exam Scare

Nagising ako kaninang umaga na may message sa cell phone. Nung mabasa ko para ko'ng natulala for a while... Gawd, NLE exam went out already.

Isang sampal ng 98% passing rate ang nagpabalikwas sa akin ng bangon.

Pucha... Kamusta naman ang pressure para sa amin na "IRREGULAR" kung tawagin nila [ng mga school officials]? We, who are always the dark side of the coin, always lurking behind the "REGULARS'" shadow... I am happy for them but at the same time, I felt something I'm not supposed to.

Tapos, "'Ye, pasado na daw ako..."----message ni Yanii.

Don't get me wrong, I'm so happy for Yanii, Iyay and Rix. Their hard work had paid off. But it just made me wonder, where does their success place me? Kakainis that it seems like their success are the measure of mine. I make it so.

I get my strength from them. I find inspiration in what I do because I have found refuge in my friendship with them... and to watch them drift away, leaving me behind as I watch them always one step ahead of me---it's a stressful sight... I know they can very well go on without having to wait for me or even include me in their plans because they don't have to. They don't need to. [Although admittedly, I wish they would---Yeah, sign of dependence.]

Truth is that they do more to me than I do for them. They are my safety net. And maybe because I have grown too comfortable with them and too dependent, that God is allowing this to happen in order to make me feel that there's nothing more factual than the reality that I have to deal with myself, alone.

I AM the only one who will have to bear with myself through tough times. I am on my own. I have to be on my own.

Dr. Christina Yang Quote from Grey's Anatomy Season 4:

"You make me sick. Have some fire. Be unstoppable. Be a force of nature. Be better than anyone here and don't give a damn what anyone thinks. There are no teams, no buddies. You're on your own. BE on your own."

Kapul naman talaga.

My quote to my groupmate early this morning who keep muttering "kung nag-board exam na tayo ngayon e di pasado na pala tayo...dami kayang nakapasa na di naman diserving o medyo mas magaling pa tayo..." Blah, blah, blah.

"Stop crying over spilt milk. It's annoying. Get over it."

That man, so full of crap.

Anger Management

Today was one of those days... I was bitching around and cranky. Almost everything pissed me off. I was warm to touch and was apparently ready to explode.

Heavy PUJ Seatmate. Well, she in a way set me up for a stressful day early this morning. She was heavy, swear... Kasi everytime na pi-preno yung jeep [at hindi siya talaga kumakapit] ay nakahilig siya sa akin and I was the one who must carry her weight for her... So, soooooooo annoying.

Buti na nga lang at wala'ng naninigarilyo sa jeep kanina... kundi lalo ako magiging cranky. I hate PUJ smokers----such insensitive smokers should go to hell. Doesn't everyone know na halos pantay lang ang risk ng taong nag-smoke sa mga taong hindi nag-smoke pero na-i-inhale niya ang usok sa pagkakaroon ng lung-related diseases??? Freakin' unfair, no? Kung minsan nga mas malaki pa ang chance na magka-Lung Cancer ang mga non-smokers o yung tinatawag na "Second Hand Smokers" kesa sa mga insensitive smokers na yan e... I hate hate hate lung cancer... It's the most difficult way to die...

Elevator Bitch. The second one to set me off, and actually was the most successful, was the elevator bitch---whoever she may be---who said "Dapat lang" in a sarcastic tone to me and my groupmate while we were leaving the elevator.

So, kwento: Lunch break na namin at from the new building ng CGH-MC, we have to go down three more floors going to the other building to avail lunch food in a 30-40 minutes break, time for eating and forming a line to the counter included. Tapos, we boarded... and then, hindi nag-overload---pero I know it was really at the brick of having the overload alarm ringing. But when we were one floor down, the door opened and there was something that triggered the alarm and someone has to go down or the elevator would not descend. Yung kaklase ko, knowing that, ay bumaba... but she was alone and we wouldn't want it that she'll be running down the stairs alone. So we all decided to unboard the elevator. we told the elevator to hold the door and we're going down... that was when I heard a voice saying "Dapat lang..."

It set me up with my nose almost blazing with flames when I said to her "Epal..." hoping that she would hear it. Sabi pa nga ni Tayne, nakasabay pa yata namin yung "Nursing Aid" [NOTE: nursing aid lang siya na nagmamagaling a... yung mga doctor nga na nasa elevator at that time wasn't even reacting or making stride remarks... such bitch...] na nag-remark ng ganon... Ampfffff...

Actually, nung isang araw pa ko nabubuwisit ng mga taong yon sa elevator. The day before naman, yung isang elevator operator naman ang nagparining when she said "ako na lang ang bababa at nakahiya naman sa inyo" in the same sarcastic tone [or almost the same tone]. To think ni wala nga siyang rason to board the elevator kasi she was the operator of the other elevator on the other side na habitually nasisira...

Okay lang naman nang before that ay sinabi ng operator [in a not so good tone] na bababa kaming mga estudyante kapag may pasyente dahil nagrereklamo daw ang mga pasyente na mga estudyante ang nakasakay sa elevator... Wala namang problema dun e. We are good and able. P'wede ba namin pababain sa wheelchair or pabangunin sa mga stretcher nila ang mga pasyente to make the walk? Kami naman ang lalabas na mga istupido nun kung ganon.

Porke't mga estudyante kami they would treat us as if they are above us? Uuuuuuuuh, they can go to hell for all I care. I am capable of giving off respect the same way that I deserve it. Now, I sound crazy and mad. I am mad, but I held it off.

Self-assertiveness, sabi ko, I need it.

China 's greatest love story ever told...

An incredible love story has come out of China recently and managed to touch the world.

It is a story of a man and an older woman who ran off to live and love each other in peace for over half a century.

The 70-year-old Chinese man who hand-carved over 6,000 stairs up a mountain for his 80-year-old wife has passed away in the cave which has been the couple's home for the last 50 years.

Over 50 years ago, Liu Guojiang a 19 year-old boy, fell in love with a 29 year-old widowed mother named Xu Chaoqin..

In a twist worthy of Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, friends and relatives criticized the relationship because of the age difference and the fact that Xu already had children.

At that time, it was unacceptable and immoral for a young man to love an older woman.. To avoid the market gossip and the scorn of their communities, the couple decided to elope and lived in a cave in Jiangjin County in Southern ChongQing Municipality.

In the beginning, life was harsh as hey had nothing, no electricity or even food. They had to eat grass and roots they found in the mountain, and Liu made a kerosene lamp that they used to light up their lives.

Xu felt that she had tied Liu down and repeatedly asked him, 'Are you regretful? Liu always replied, 'As long as we are industrious, life will improve.'

In the second year of living in the mountain, Liu began and continued for over 50 years, to hand-carve the steps so that his wife could get down the mountain easily.

Half a century later in 2001, a group of adventurers were exploring the forest and were surprised to find the elderly couple and the over 6,000 hand-carved steps. Liu MingSheng, one of their seven children said, 'My parents loved each other so much, they have lived in seclusion for over 50 years and never been apart a single day. He hand carved more than 6,000 steps over the years for my mother's convenience, although she doesn't go down the mountain that much.'

The couple had lived in peace for over 50 years until last week. Liu, now 72 years, returned from his daily farm work and collapsed. Xu sat and prayed with her husband as he passed away in her arms. So in love with Xu, was Liu, that no one was able to release the grip he had on his wife's hand even after he had passed away.

'You promised me you'll take care of me, you'll always be with me until the day I died, now you left before me, how am I going to live without you?'

Xu spent days softly repeating this sentence and touching her husband's black coffin with tears rolling down her cheeks.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In 2006, their story became one of the top 10 love stories from China , collected by the Chinese Women Weekly. The local government has decided to preserve the love ladder and the place they lived as a museum, so this love story can live forever.

YIEL'S NOTE: This is an email forwarded to me by Ms. Herher... I'm not sure about when it actually happened.

China 's greatest love story ever told...

An incredible love story has come out of China recently and managed to touch the world.

It is a story of a man and an older woman who ran off to live and love each other in peace for over half a century.

The 70-year-old Chinese man who hand-carved over 6,000 stairs up a mountain for his 80-year-old wife has passed away in the cave which has been the couple's home for the last 50 years.

Over 50 years ago, Liu Guojiang a 19 year-old boy, fell in love with a 29 year-old widowed mother named Xu Chaoqin..

In a twist worthy of Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, friends and relatives criticized the relationship because of the age difference and the fact that Xu already had children.

At that time, it was unacceptable and immoral for a young man to love an older woman.. To avoid the market gossip and the scorn of their communities, the couple decided to elope and lived in a cave in Jiangjin County in Southern ChongQing Municipality.

In the beginning, life was harsh as hey had nothing, no electricity or even food. They had to eat grass and roots they found in the mountain, and Liu made a kerosene lamp that they used to light up their lives.

Xu felt that she had tied Liu down and repeatedly asked him, 'Are you regretful? Liu always replied, 'As long as we are industrious, life will improve.'

In the second year of living in the mountain, Liu began and continued for over 50 years, to hand-carve the steps so that his wife could get down the mountain easily.

Half a century later in 2001, a group of adventurers were exploring the forest and were surprised to find the elderly couple and the over 6,000 hand-carved steps. Liu MingSheng, one of their seven children said, 'My parents loved each other so much, they have lived in seclusion for over 50 years and never been apart a single day. He hand carved more than 6,000 steps over the years for my mother's convenience, although she doesn't go down the mountain that much.'

The couple had lived in peace for over 50 years until last week. Liu, now 72 years, returned from his daily farm work and collapsed. Xu sat and prayed with her husband as he passed away in her arms. So in love with Xu, was Liu, that no one was able to release the grip he had on his wife's hand even after he had passed away.

'You promised me you'll take care of me, you'll always be with me until the day I died, now you left before me, how am I going to live without you?'

Xu spent days softly repeating this sentence and touching her husband's black coffin with tears rolling down her cheeks.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In 2006, their story became one of the top 10 love stories from China , collected by the Chinese Women Weekly. The local government has decided to preserve the love ladder and the place they lived as a museum, so this love story can live forever.

YIEL'S NOTE: This is an email forwarded to me by Ms. Herher... I'm not sure about when it actually happened.